Calculated vs Central Self, part 2.

I said in last week's post that there were several implications to discuss from the calculated/central self theory. However, it has been a full week since I wrote about this, so I'm pulling a paragraph from that post to get us all back on the same page.

"The Art of Possibility says that there are two versions of a person called the central self and the calculated self. Everyone seems to assume that the central self is obvious to us, which is probably a discussion for another post. But the interesting theory in The Art of Possibility is that the calculated self is created as a result of childhood survival strategies. My understanding of the theory is that each child survives by figuring out how to get what they need to feel safe. These strategies are the foundation of personality and, particularly, for stress response behaviors. If you take a look at those last 2 sentences, they implications are fairly astounding."

Last week, I looked at this in terms of work culture and environment where many people join to create a whole, but that is only one area of application. If this theory is correct, then it should play out for the individual as well. And that is where I'm struggling with the concept. If, as the theory states, our personalities are formed by the survival strategies that we developed in childhood, then how do we ever learn to be adults?

Let's assume that, for me personally, my childhood survival strategy was to smooth things out as much as possible. I created a safe place for myself by ensuring that there were no bumps in the road to create stress for anyone else. Then a career as a professional optimizer would make sense for me. But how did I learn to change the "child fixer" behavior to "adult fixer"? Is it just a matter of learning new skills in line with a personality that was created many years ago?

And what does it mean if I decide that I'm really a designer and not a fixer/optimizer. Does that mean that the personality I developed as a child is being overwritten? Is it possible to develop a new version of personality based on adult understandings? Or is this an example of finding some element of my "central self"?

As you can see, I have more questions than answers. As always, I rather like this phase of the process. I have some more moodling to do on the subject before I get any useful output, I suspect. And, of course, this is all seen from my point of view (5'4 - a little taller in heels). Other perspectives (oh, ADAW) are welcome!