As most of you know, my sister, V - and her kittling Bear - joined our little desert household. She and I were having a big philosophical discussion about self discovery and understanding "WHO AM I" and all of those things the other day.
We were about 25 minutes into the discussion when HTH walked into the kitchen. I turned to him and asked if he had time for a quick question. I then asked if he had some thoughts on how most people deal with self discovery and understanding who they are. As he was gathering a few things to head out the door, he said something along these lines.
Most people don't really want to spend time thinking about who they are, but it isn't actually that hard to figure out. A person is really the sum of all of their actions. Talk and theory are not enough to understand who someone really is. Also, any isolated action is not enough. A person could be fully understood only if it were possible to see all of the things that they do. And with that 2 minute comment, he was out the door.
Needless to say, this hit our discussion like a very small atom bomb. V and I had been discussing the equivalent to the Freudian talk therapy method of self definition. HTH pointed out that the same effect was possible with behavioral modification.
And, in the end, that is what Lighten Up is. I spent many hours in previous years researching, considering, discussing and theorizing about all of the potential changes that would help me feel more aligned with my own life. But, in the end, thinking and discussing is only so useful. I had to just do some things - just like HTH said about the self definition - and that is why I started the Lighten Up year.
What this story also shows is one of the reasons that I married HTH. It would've taken many more hours of discussion before I actually got to the point of realizing that self definition - like Lighten Up - is all about what I do. But, despite the fact that the answer was obvious from the HTH perspective, he understood the question and knew how to answer in such a way that he met me in the middle. Cool, huh?
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4 comments:
how true. he is clever your man
I'm so glad you married that guy!!
The first bumper sticker I bought for my car said "Life is simple it's just not easy" It meant a lot then and it still holds true. Ask a simple man a question and you will get a simple answer.
He's cute, too! Not just clever!
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