Because That's Just What Havens Do

I honestly didn't think that I would blog this week because I am, as you can see from this picture, mid project. But after a few days of keeping pace with our young helper, I need to sit still for a bit. Also, there is a story to this project that I think I can tell you - though I'll not be able to do it justice - that is all about why I'm working so hard on this haven idea.

Way back in the fall, when I planted these bushes, I had the idea of creating a space under our big front yard tree. This space would be somewhat separate from the street and draw on the way this tree works - leafy and shady in the summer but bare to allow sun through in the winter. In my mind, I could see a little path way or two that ran through the space with possibly a bench or something to encourage lingering. It was a physical images of an outdoor haven that I found really appealing.

The fact that I could use the word "little" when thinking about a path that follows the edge of a tree canopy that is 20 feet in diameter shows that I was clearly delusional. I figured that out quite quickly (for me) and had just about decided to shelf this project for another year. I was going to do a limited version of the spring planting and let it go.

But that is where Cody comes in to the story. Cody, our young helper, who works for us 20-25 hours a week. I can't tell you his story, in part because I don't think I know it all, but also because it is a hard story to hear in person and impossible for me to even consider writing. To help you understand, I'll give you a few things that I think of as the bare bones of his tale - with no real depth or c0lor.

Cody was D2's first friend in the neighborhood. He moved to live with his biological mother 3 or 4 years ago. He was lucky to get out of that situation alive. He, with a little butt kicking from his impressive girlfriend, changed his whole life a little over a year ago. He and his girlfriend, along with her mother and his aunt, are now raising their 2 month old daughter. He goes to high school at night and works for us 4 or 5 hours a day. If you would like to meet an impressive, but far from perfect, human example of what today's teenagers can do, come to my house any week day morning. I'll let you talk to him.

The tricky part about Cody working for us is that there is only so much he can do. He is too young to take onto job sites - both in maturity but also for potential liability issues - so we need to have work for him to do here. He is a serious worker - fast and efficient - so even finding 20 hours for him to do can be tough, but, HTH and I are starting projects - like this pathway - that we would gladly have put off just to make sure that we do. Because the haven requires it of us.

Let me explain. Cody is 15 months out from having made a tough but very positive decision in his life. The old way was definitely the path of least resistance. This new way - while much better and more suited to his style - is tougher. T0 stay the course on this path, he needs some help and encouragement but he also needs to feel like he is a useful contributor to something good.

Interestingly enough, HTH and I are still building on the physical aspects of this haven/business/house as well as the investment house. We could use a serious worker to do some of the heavy lifting - or digging or demolishing or painting or.... And, despite the fact that this house normally resists most of the changes that we propose, the space seems to be ready for us to get it done.

So, if you're working on building a haven, and you have a young one who needs some encouragement in the form of part time work, and you've carefully marshaled your resources over the years so that you can afford to pay him, it all falls into place quite nicely. At this point in the haven process, it doesn't feel like it is because of anything that Cody, HTH or I have done or decided. It happened because that's just what havens do.

Yes, thinking about and working on this whole haven thing is - well - work. And, yes, there are other things that I need to do as well. But it is starting to look like the work thus far has just been to overcome the initial inertia. After that, who knows? Maybe havens become self sustaining creatures that encourage haven-osity all on their own! And, at some point while I was wheel barrowing dirt from the front yard to the back today, I couldn't help but think, "Wow! How cool is that?" Because causing random amazement is just another part of what havens do!