On change

They say it takes 21 days to change a habit. But - at the beginning of week 3 - I'm thinking that I'm already pretty comfortable with working part time.

This week, as I suspected, several project issues bubbled up with my replacements - but nothing earth shattering. I've yet to make it through the full monthly cycle of running the business and family finances, but I'm not seeing any surprises there either.

The biggest surprise is what a difference it makes to have some time. I've been sorting and cleaning - both in the house and in my head - and am starting to feel...well... it is hard to describe. I suspect that I will be a little nutty around the edges for a few more weeks until I get this all sorted out again. But that won't stop me from doing the projects on my list and going to the farmer's market every week and working - both for the company and our own business - and STILL getting more sleep every night than I have in literally 2 years.

So, yes, transitions are stressful. And, yes, change is tough. And I may only blog 2x a week for the next few weeks. But, all in all, I think this is going to be quite nice....

Ch-ch-ch-changes

Hi!

I thought I'd post a few pics. See? I don't look that different, right? This is me at Amy's house. I took this while listening to a 4 hour conference call today, so you're lucky that I look this coherent! But, this front view is a bit misleading.

You see, I cut most of my hair off on Saturday night. As you are all aware, that is always an indicator of SOMEthing. I'm still not sure of all that it means, myself. But it is fall, which is a time of transition for me. And it is almost Q4, which is always a decision making point in my job. And it is an encouragement to me to quit hiding. So, instead of dwelling on the transitions or fussing with the details in my head, I just cut my hair. And since several of you won't see this for a while (what with work and travel), I thought I'd post it.

Enjoy!

Hoarding

Sometimes it takes another pair of eyes. My father-in-law commented on this stack of books and then - in an unrelated conversation - reminded me that sometimes we can appear to be superficially fine while not actually handling events well. This stack of books is a perfect example.

I work for a corporation this is undergoing a major culture change. They have maintained an "old school" business model – defined benefit plan retirement, substantial rewards for longevity, promoting primarily from within, making decisions based on relationships and hierarchy. The “stick with us, we’ll take care of you” model. This model was very common 20 years ago in all industries. It has been gradually disappearing from publicly traded companies for 10 or more years now, depending on the industry. It is disappearing very rapidly at my current place of employment.

For me, dealing with change is fairly normal. I am the kind of problem solver that is often hired to work through this kind of change. It has been a part of every job that I have ever done. The cycle of work for someone like me is such that my husband and I always have money set aside for my potential job loss. In this case, I anticipate that to occur with the next 6-12 months, with a nice severance package. Since this is just about as long as I think I can handle the current working environment, it should be perfect. Ask me, and I'll tell you that I'm fine with this change.

That stack of books says that I'm not fine. What you see there is 1/2 of the books that I've bought in the last month. I've been buying new books before even finishing the books that I've already bought - which is not normal for me. I buy just about anything that strikes me. I'm completely out of control. I'm buying books like there is no tomorrow - which is really my point.

When I leave my current job, my next job will be as support staff for our new small business. To diversify our income, I may do other jobs - short contracts, corporate teaching, or seasonal work. But for the most part, our family income will come from my husband's work and I will not be making any money.

Intellectually, I know that worrying about this is silly. The business is doing very well. We've been through the slow season and seen that there is still money to be made even then. We're conservative in our spending (despite my recent book spree) and need very little income to meet our current lifestyle. I will always find ways to save money and generate more income as needed. Thinking logically and rationally, there is no reason to be concerned. The stacks of books around the house are not helping me think that way.

So, I'll avoid Amazon and the bookstores for a while. I'll read what I have and let you know how I like them. With such a large stack of books, by the time I'm done with these, my whole world may well have changed anyway.