Back again after a long hiatus. It has been a busy time, with some fruitfulness and a fair amount of fretfulness. To be honest, it feels like 2009 has spiraled far, far away from any intentions that I might have had for it. Part of the problem is that I began the year exhausted and soul weary from a number of years of ill fitting work, so I intended very little. And, of course, there were any number of events that allowed me ample excuse for sidetracking - both good and bad. I know that there will be more to come in 2010, so I'm thinking and planning and attending to my own little brain garden to prepare for the year to come.
I've never been a fan of resolutions, so I'm adopting Christine Kane's "Word of the Year" idea. The plan is to adopt a single quality as a point of focus for 2010. While there is a fair amount of the "intention" process that seems suspicious to me, I can see ways to make this idea work for me.
The problem, of course, is the word. I'm looking at 2 ideas at the moment, and will probably have a few more before I settle on anything. I'm just putting this out to all of you to see what comes to mind.
1: Sovereign, sovereignty, drive. These all started with Havi Brooks' posts on the CEO with Stripey Socks (part 1 and part 2) where she realized that (my paraphrase) she needed to stand in her own light and ask for what she needs but do it in a way that doesn't diminish others' right to do the same. There are a lot of connotations to "sovereign" that I resist. I spent some time in Merriam-Websters and found a lot that I did like, as well - especially the adjectives superlative, curative and unqualified. It may be that I just don't like the authoritative aspect of the word - but then again - I'll be 40 this year. Seriously, shouldn't I deal with that sometime? Drive is my possible modification to this idea - because my car has always represented autonomy and "me-ness" and also (I really hate to admit this) the Incubus song. What can I say, it was on the radio while I was thinking about this....
2: This one is newer, so less formed. It seems that one of the key things I've lost is what Ms. AW used to call my "childlike sense of wonder". I had an eye for beauty and loveliness that colored even the most dull days. Now, I can only sense things that way sporadically and often go for weeks without realizing that is gone. That one trait has often kept me from sliding irrevocably into the many abysses that I've explored, so I think that would be a good focus as well. The con with this idea is that I can't come up with anything that doesn't sound passive to me - which puts it in opposition to the "CEO in Rocket Dogs" (Havi has stripey socks, but I have Rocket Dogs!) idea.
Possible words for that one: wonderment, beauty, loveliness.
So, I'm open to suggestions, ideas, theories and general discussion. All of you that I speak to regularly will be roped into this on the phone as well, so be prepared! And, if you're thinking about a word for your year, what will it be? Why?
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5 comments:
Hmm - maybe I like number 2 because I don't fully understand number 1. Or because I hate that life has taken some of your joy - for a time. Somehow losing ones innocence/wonder at everything seems to make the brief glimpses of it more sweet. When they eventually come.
Hmmm... I'll probably need to explain the sovereignty bit better, then.
sovreign as in governing your self? in charge? i like that. i think the wonder will come back - you are a very curious person and once the air balloon of your life lets your feet land back on the ground it will all come back!
i think my word for at least the first part of the year is everyday - as in routine and comfort and being in one place.
Everyday sounds VERY good for you this year!
And yes, sovereign, as in autonomous but also as the older version of "supreme excellence or an example of it".
that is good for you as you are supremely excellent!
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